Death

The Grateful List

Posted by Susan

My Aunt Suzy, who is a truly enlightened person from my perspective, sent out her Christmas greetings this year by sharing her “Grateful List”.  I was so touched by this that I asked if she would mind if I posted it on my blog.  This ability to look at what’s right in your world, to appreciate the people and the beauty around you, can make such a difference to your own feelings of well-being and to the contribution you can make to everyone you touch.  We all have frustrations and hardships that we must face in life but we all also have wonderful gifts and people.  The more energy that you devote to the latter, the more positive the energy that you radiate both inside and outside of yourself.  This does not always come natural to us.  It takes commitment and perseverance.

So, here is Suzy’s “Grateful List” for 2010. 

As I look out onto the pure white landscape with snow laden trees and buildings, Xmas lights shining through, I’m once again reminded of how extraordinarily beautiful winter can be in this part of the world, and how lucky I am to enjoy it all. 

I’ve read and heard in the various courses I take what ‘good medicine’ it is to practice thankfulness, and I am a believer:  it’s a wonderful way to get the warm fuzzies, putting your mind to all that is good in your life.  So this year, instead of a letter I’m sending you my Grateful List, as a way of sharing with you matters to me.

 THIS YEAR I AM GRATEFUL FOR:

  •  the discovery of a new hobby – walking.  I’d never taken the time to just walk, and this spring, summer and fall were utterly perfect for my newfound activity; even now that we have winter I’m enjoying walks along the trail – I never realized how lovely it is to just simply ‘be’ out there, with no phones, no noise other than the birds, no talking (well, I do talk to Aub on our morning walks), no pressure – just absorbing the energy of nature around me and being alone with my thoughts.  Author Sarah Ban Breathnach says “…I walk regularly for my soul, and my body tags along.”  I know exactly what she means.
  • the gift I was given this year of a health challenge (pacemaker implant, then blood clot at the insertion site), which afforded me the opportunity to take an extended leave of absence from work.  As a result, I was able to spend many precious hours with my mother in her last two months.  She died very peacefully in her sleep in March, having made a remarkable and beautiful transition from believing she would get well and go home, to accepting the next step with courage, curiosity and grace.  It was an honour to walk with her on her final journey.
  • the wisdom of my friend and colleague Jane, who upon returning from another mission in Haiti affirmed that it’s the small acts of contribution we do day-to-day which truly make a difference. 
  • the fact that life continues to surprise me.  After struggling with the decision of whether or not to retire, I did so in July and have been amazed that after 40 years of looking after other people I am finding great satisfaction and serenity in just looking after me.  I’m not the slightest bit bored, and am astonished at how quickly a day goes by.  I would have thought I’d have had the cleanest house in Listowel by now, but so far I’ve cleaned one closet and am learning to make peace with dust bunnies.  It has been unexpectedly the easiest transition of a life stage I’ve ever made.
  • the contributions to my life that all of my family have made – my husband, sons, Casey, my sisters, their mates and families, my brothers-in-law, their mates and families, my Earle relatives … and the best mother-in-law on the planet.  I grow more and more appreciative of how lucky I am to have their love and support.  And they’re all such interesting people!  I picked well this time.
  • likewise, the encouragement and support from my many wonderful friends – every year of course, but this year in particular.  I think it takes a village to shepherd someone through the minefield of grief.  This year my friends were enormously helpful shepherds, and genuinely caring friends.  I’m getting good at picking!
  • the ability and opportunity to attend the various courses and lectures with my spiritual sisters – it’s such a gift to enjoy their camaraderie while getting my spiritual batteries recharged.
  • that Aub had the joy of playing the best round of golf in his life last summer, shooting 5 under par!
  • that a lovely young couple has moved into Mom’s little house, are fixing it up and making a wonderful home, and that there will soon be a baby in it for the first time in decades.  Mom would like that very much.
  • that for once in 40 years I was able to say (albeit for a brief time), “My Leafs are undefeated!” 
  • the gift of receiving and reciprocating love from 2 special cats –Ripley and Pax, who both went to heaven this fall.  Ripley, who finally used up all nine of her lives at the age of 13, but not before giving me much extra special attention when I was grieving for Mom.  Although she hadn’t been an overly affectionate cat, during those many months she would climb up on me until her body was fully against my chest, front legs over my shoulders as though she was hugging me.  And little Pax, a stray kitten I fell in love with at first sight, who succumbed to Feline Leukemia after going blind.  He was the most affectionate cat we’ve ever had, preferring our attention to food.  Though he was only with us for 4 months, he inserted himself right into our hearts.  I am grateful to have known that little guy – and to be reminded of the lessons animals have to teach us.   About unconditional love; about not thinking too much; about finding joy in the simplest things; about being perfectly happy with just a full tummy, a toy, a snuggle and a warm soft place to sleep. 

 Seems like a good place to stop for today.  Tomorrow there will be other things on my Grateful List – many the same, some new.   It’s a very worthwhile way to occupy the mind, and infinitely more satisfying than listening to the news or worrying about what-ifs. 

The Dalai Lama says:  “If you want to know what you were doing in the past, look at your body now; if you want to know what will happen to you in the future, look at what your mind is doing now.”   My wish for you this Christmas season is that your own Grateful List will be carried with you in your hearts, revised from time to time, but remembered often.  And that it will always make you smile, inside and out. 

 Namaste

Vision Speak Reading

Posted by Eden

 The following is the presentation with three short readings from the “Vision Speak” Book Launch in February.

In “Vision Speak”, a powerful matriarch leaves an explosive legacy for her great granddaughter.  Willow’s expanding consciousness threatens her society but may hold the key to humanity’s future.

People have asked where I came up with the ideas for this story and what was I thinking…

Vision Speak Book Launch - Reading
Vision Speak Book Launch – Reading

When I began this journey, I was plagued by questions.

Simple ones like: Why are we here?  Why do some people die young? Why can’t we live in harmony? …and … Why is there so much senseless violence in the world? 

These questions led me in a variety of directions and some of the research underlying the concepts in this book included:

–         The history and evolution of man and civilization

–         World Religions – the beauty, the wisdom and the sorrow, futility and failings

–         New Age Philosophies and Spirituality

–         Jung and Freud, particularly Jung’s theories on the collective unconscious

–         Joseph Campbell and his ideas on mythology and religion and their metaphorical  value

I know this sounds heavy but it’s not really, not at the level that I was searching.  I’m no expert in any of these areas, just someone who craves answers to unanswerable questions. 

Basically, I found glimmers of wisdom and imagined the rest.

This story takes place centuries after global wars and devastation have led to a new world order.  The Republic now controls and restricts all spiritual practices, intent on preventing the mistakes of the past from ever happening again.

Willow has violated her Spiritual Contract, secretly trained in “Vision Speak” by her mentor, Elzabeth.  In this first reading towards the end of Chapter 1, Willow and Elzabeth are connecting at a deep, inner place…

Starting at the bottom of page 9:

 After that, time swept away. Despite her agitated morning, Willow reached the state quickly, effortlessly—with minimal guidance from her mentor. It seemed to go faster every time. Within minutes, she became immersed in a waking dream, a trance-like existence where she was still aware, still conscious of her surroundings and yet her inner being was animated and exposed as never before. The old matriarch and her young descendant interacted with visions and feelings, thought-pictures and senses. It was like an inner voice, a connection of directed, shared dreams. Great Bet called it Vision Speak. The two women were oblivious to the absolute silence in the room. To them, their surroundings were vibrantly alive.

Finally they stopped. Willow sensed that her great grandmother was growing weary. Returning her attention to the physical world, she gawked at the time display. Two hours had passed. She resigned herself to missing her Experimental Art class too, yet it didn’t seem important anymore. The room, its occupants, the outside world—everything—had a fresh glow. The world was transforming before her eyes. It all coalesced unlike ever before.

Elzabeth had sunk deeper into her pillows, her eyes glazed. Concerned, Willow bounded out of her chair, energy pulsing through her. She leaned over her great grandmother, smoothing back her silvery-white halo. “Great Bet. Are you okay?”

Deep wrinkles and lips curved upward. “I’m wonderful, so wonderful thanks to you.” Her voice was barely above a whisper. Willow leaned in closer. “Oh, my dear, why didn’t I teach you long ago? I didn’t sense the possibility until I saw you again at my birthday party. It struck me that day so clearly that you were open but even then, I had no idea what you would be capable of. The others will be shocked when they experience your abilities.”

“You must tell me about the others. Who are they?”

“I meant the Vision Speak group at the Center, especially Jill, Aaron, and Simon. But, you can’t meet them yet. I don’t know how I’m going to explain this.” Her eyelids fluttered but she continued. “I’ll sort this out before I’m gone, my dear. I promise.” Her words trailed off at the end so that Willow had to strain to hear. 

Leaning forward, she kissed the wrinkled forehead and pulled the covers up. “I’d better go now, Great Bet. You need to rest.”

“Wait.” Elzabeth’s eyes shot open and she gripped the young hand. “I forgot to tell you something.”

“What is it?”

“When I die…”

“Shh—no, don’t say that.”

 “Don’t be foolish.” The frail woman snapped. “I’m dying soon and it’s long past due so don’t waste my remaining time with platitudes.”

“Okay, sorry.” She mumbled. “Please continue.”

“I want you to know that I’ve changed my will. I’ve made you my Protector.”

Willow gasped. To be the keeper and protector of memories was a privilege, usually entrusted to someone more mature, someone who had known the departed for many years. This meant that she, and she alone, would be responsible for Elzabeth’s Life Journals.

“Oh, I’m honoured, Great Bet. Really I am, but what will Grandma Sybil say? What will my mother say?” Her voice raised a decibel when she mentioned her mother. Willow sank back down into the chair, chewing on her fingernails.

“I don’t give a donkey’s ass what they say. I’m tired now, Willow, we’ll talk more later. You should know that before I found you, I wasn’t entrusting my journals to anyone in the family. And now that I’ve discovered you, now that I see what you can do, this is the only way. But, I know the legacy I’m leaving you…it won’t be easy. There may be, uh, interference.”

“What do you mean?”

The old woman closed her eyes again. She was silent for seconds that stretched out like minutes. She never answered Willow’s question but she did whisper one more instruction. “Please be careful. Keep the journals secret, even with the family—at least until you’re ready.” She smiled weakly. “I’ll explain more next time.”

But there never was a next time.

Before we jump ahead 17 chapters, here’s a brief background on what’s happened.

Elzabeth dies, leaving her journals to Willow in a public ceremony garnering unwanted attention from Republic leaders, spies, and even her family.  Willow joins the “Vision Speak” group and her abilities advance rapidly.  She finds herself attracted to one of their leaders, Aaron.  They’re out together when they discover they’re being followed by Republic agents and Aaron gets a glimpse of Willow’s secret abilities for the first time.

In this scene, they’ve escaped to a secluded garden where Willow is reading a sealed entry from Elzabeth’s journal to Aaron.  The entry describes an unexpected encounter with a powerful presence that Elzabeth could not explain.  Willow is seeking Aaron’s advice but they get distracted..

Second excerpt (from Chapter 18, mid page 96-97) 

Looking back at what happened as I record this entry, I struggle to find the words to describe the actual encounter. What stands out in my mind is the power of the visitor. I cannot say what the intention was—the force of it took me by surprise and my only response was to flee, to sever the connection.

I am home now and for the first time, I question what this new evolution of the human spirit will bring. Have I been too naïve? I’ve been so convinced that once all humans could relate at this level, understand each other to the depths of their souls that senseless violence, misunderstandings and manipulations would cease to hinder mankind’s progress.

But what if I am wrong? What if there are evil forces that will use this power for destructive means? I worry now that perhaps the cult has been resurrected. I thought we had disbanded them and their Sacred Trance sessions but now I don’t know. I pray that I have not been wrong.

Willow finished the passage and turned her unit off, gazing at Aaron. She admired the contours of his face in shadow, his wavy, thick hair. Not for the first time that night, she had to contain an urge to reach out and touch him, stroking the wild hair down, running her fingers along his muscular arms and back.

“Whew—that’s intense. I wasn’t aware of this.” Aaron looked off into the distance as he talked, searching his memory banks. “I’ll ask my mother if Elzabeth shared this with her but I think she would have mentioned it.

Do you know what she meant by the cult?”

Willow slipped the unit into her handbag, and set it down on the grass beside them. She stretched out her long legs, leaning back with her hands holding her weight behind her, gazing up at the majestic branches overhead. She knew Aaron’s eyes followed her movements, first her legs then tracing his way along her body up to her throat and face. Could he really think that she didn’t notice? Her long hair hung back behind her, almost touching the ground.

Softly she responded, careful not to disturb the currents that were humming between them. “No, I was hoping you might know.” She looked into his eyes then. “Have you ever experienced anything like that?” It was dark, they could barely see each other but something snapped between them.

Although she stayed perfectly still, she drew him in. It was imperceptible—a slight arch of her hips, the staccato sound of her breathing, perhaps pheromones triggered by her intense longing. He responded as if on a string.

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